Knowing what you want
by Hananiah
Summary: Buffy knows that Angel and Xander are meant to be. Now the hard part is getting them to realize it SLASH
1. Default Chapter

Title: A little friendly push Summery: Buffy knows that Angel and Xander belong so she wants to help Disclaimer: all characters belong to Joss Whedon. (Like I'm cool enough to create Buffy) Spoilers: The Zeppo, Becoming, etc, season 3 AU  
  
"Hey Xand wait up!" Xander Harriss turned as he saw Buffy sprint up to his side. She was barely out of breath and her smile was just a litle too chirpy. "Hey Buff" he said warily. He knew she was about to try to fix him up with someone. Buffy tucked her arm in Xanders as she started to lead him into the cemetry. "I think we need to talk" she began and Xander had the urge to close his eyes. He wished Buffy would quit on her campaign to get Xander and Angel together. The blond was sure they 'belonged together'  
  
Xander thought maybe she had hit her head too hard when she was attacked by a vampire. "What do you want to talk about Buff?" Buffy sighed, looking anywhere but at her best friend. She knew what she was about to say wouldn't be warmly greated but she just knew her friends belonged together.  
  
"We need to talk about the kiss" when Xander refused to comment Buffy pressed "The kiss you and Angel had"  
  
"It was nothing" Xander lied  
  
Buffy's smile was sweet, almost dreamy. "Xand I have watched every chick flick ever and that kiss was not nothing. That was defiently something" She knew she had him but he still wouldn't admit it. Buffy suddenly detached from Xander and walked in front of him, walking backwards, expertly manouvering through the headstones. Her tone was almoat sing song.  
  
"Tell me when you were with Angel you weren't happy." She demanded, knowing she was rigtht.  
  
Xander just shook his head mutely.  
  
Nada.  
  
"Xand I'm not asking you to take out a joint checking account but it's important that you admit how you are feeling. It says so in Cosmos" she said importantly.  
  
Xander arched an eyebrow "Well now I'm convinced"  
  
Buffy scowled "Hey I;m trying to help here"  
  
"Help or interfere?"  
  
Bufyf shrugged holding both hands up and juggling them  
  
"Help, intervere. Not much difference"  
  
Xander couldn't help smiling, Buffy's perkiness was infectious  
  
"I hate you" he said perfectly nicely.  
  
"Focused anger means I'm onto something" Buffy crowed.  
  
"Does Cosmos say that?" Xander wanted to know. Buffy shook her head. She wanted to make fun of the relationship but this was the serious deal. Buffy was glad that Xander would finally be in a relationship where it was equal where both parties were happy. Of course she had to get them together first.  
  
Xander sighed wraping his arm around Buffy.  
  
"How about we focus this anger on some vamps. Kay?"  
  
Buffy nodded silently. 


	2. Cordelia intervention and home truths

"So how's everything going on the whole get-Xander-and-Angel-togther plan going?" Cordeila asked as she sat down beside Willow. The redhead frowned in contemplation. "I think we need a smaller title" she mused. Cordelia elegantly dusted off a doughnut and took a bite.  
  
"It's not like it's a big deal anymore. It's pretty much the whole 'thing' these days" the cheerleader frowned as if Xander being more fashionable then her was disturbing.  
  
Buffy seconded that. "And he really couldn't have chosen a more public place to do it." She glanced around the cafeteria noting the many whispers throughout the room that ranged from the jocks to the nerds.  
  
"I mean the winter festival that everyone attended. Xander kissed Angel right in the middle of the dance floor."  
  
Willow pulled the sleeves of her long jumper over her fists and gazed dreamily at the far wall. "It was so romantic" she enthused. "And so brave, I mean not in the whole killing demons for a living but still so brave."  
  
Cordelia rolled her eyes at her friend but it didn't have the usual scorn. "We all know Willow."  
  
The girls looked up as Larry appeared the large boy had an unbelievably large smile across his face.  
  
"Man Harriss is my hero. I could never have done that! I mean kiss a guy like in front of everyone. Man that so rocks"  
  
Buffy tried to process that and realized in his own way Larry had just complimented Xander.  
  
"Thanks Larry. I'm sure he'll appreciate that"  
  
Satisfied the jock turned away. Buffy leaned forward so only her bested buds could hear her. "Has anyone seen Xander anyway?"  
  
That only brought frowns and shaking of heads.  
  
Speak of the devil Xander appeared. The dark haired boy took a seat by Cordelia, taking one of her carrot sticks. Biting into it he grimaced "How can you eat that Cor?"  
  
Cordelia folded her arms over her cheast. "So you and Angel getting it together?"  
  
When she received glares from the rest of the tables occupants she groaned.  
  
"Please like any of you were gonna say it. Listen up Harriss cause I am not doing this again. Kissing Angel was probably the most single coolest thing you will ever achieve okay? So don't blow it."  
  
That being said the cheerleader got up and swept from the room leaving the scoobies staring after her.  
  
Buffy recovered first "So are you actually gonna listen to her holiness?"  
  
Xander didn't look up from the comic book he had been reading. "Why? It happened I have my five minutes of popularity and I am happy. By the way why are you so into this Angel's your guy"  
  
Buffy ticked the items of the list.  
  
"One.Angel and I are history. Two I can't believe we never saw how good you two are together and three Cordy's so right."  
  
"Look guys I am not ready to be dealing with this"  
  
Buffy suddenly realized how lost and confused Xander really was and instantly covered his hand with hers. Willow quickly followed.  
  
"But when you do we'll be here. And most importantly so will Angel" 


	3. Angel

Summery: Pretty much how Angel feels  
  
NOTE: In Passion Jenny doesn't die  
  
The mansion hadn't changed much and as Buffy made her way through the heavy black curtains she could tell little had changed inside as well. Inside a huge fire burned although she suspected that it was for her comfort then his since as a vampire Angel didn't need heat.  
  
"Angel, you around?"  
  
The call echoed around her but no answer. Shrugging Buffy threw her school bag onto the floor and started stretching. She enjoyed these sparring sessions with Angel, and now she could get something out of him about Xander. She was halfway through her exercise when Angel appeared.  
  
The vampire wore a surprised smile that slipped slightly when he saw Buffy.  
  
"I heard voices" he clarified.  
  
Buffy arched an eyebrow. 'I wonder who he had been waiting for a visit from?' she wondered ironically.  
  
"Just my voice. You expecting anyone else?" she asked, Angel blinked a couple of times and stammered through some answers until he blurted defensively. "No"  
  
Buffy giggled inwardly. It really was too easy. Outwardly she just shrugged.  
  
"So you ready to get on with this?"  
  
Angel nodded.  
  
Three hours later Buffy was ready to drop. She dropped sleepily in front of the fire trying to ease some feeling into her leg muscles.  
  
"So how is everyone?" Angel asked at a good imitation of casual.  
  
Buffy listed them off. Willow dating Oz, Giles and Jenny going strong. She purposefully left out Xander.  
  
"Oh I'm Glad."  
  
Buffy stared impassively at him, waiting. He was going to ask about Xander.  
  
One. Two. Three.  
  
"Well I guess we should call it a day" he announced, getting up from his sitting position and heading deeper into the mansion. Buffy knew she was being dismissed.  
  
Buffy seriously wondered if she could kill Angel, she stared at the vampire with her mouth open slightly wanting to say something but not sure what she could say.  
  
"Yeah. Better go"  
  
Glaring at him she spun on her heel and left. 


	4. MIA

"Demon, slug eating dog, vampires, witches, werewolves...." Xander Harris wrote each of the species down carefully with a description of them. The Library was peacefully quiet; Xander shifted on his duvet that he had set up on the table-since his parents had had yet another row Xander had decided to crash at the library. He smiled as he remembered how Buffy had demanded that she stay the night as well.  
  
It was turning into a little slumber party; Xander knew how lucky he was to have friends like Willow and Buffy.  
  
He looked up to see Buffy tottering into the room, her arms full of duvet, pillows and hundreds of magazines, instantly Xander got up to help relieving her of her load. Buffy shot him a smile as she let the rest fall to the ground.  
  
"Buff this is just for a couple of nights not a week" he admonished the slayer as the blond began to set up her bed space.  
  
"I like to feel at home" the slayer replied as she put the magazines in a stack, she peeled one out and flipped through it until she got to a model that she liked, she gave a small whistle and then showed her friend the glossy page.  
  
Xander almost took a step backward, the male model had dark clothes, dark hair and dark eyes, the only difference between him and Angel was the guy had colour.  
  
Xander counted to ten, his friends had been dropping hints all week, and he was sick of it. "I'm going to see where I can score some snacks"  
  
Buffy pouted at Xander's back until she rested back on her bedspread. Okay so she was getting nowhere. She looked up as Cordelia Chase and Willow Rosenberg appeared, the tall brunette looked as gorgeous as ever whilst Willow remained the shy, pretty girl.  
  
"Cordy it's your turn to think of something to get Xander and Angel together" Buffy said throwing her magazine across the floor.  
  
Cordelia examined her nails. "Well I have all the keys to the broom closets in my bag" she said. Buffy and Willow exchanged looks of surprise.  
  
"Okay I don't want to know" Buffy said at last.  
  
"What do you do, to get a guy to like you?" she added  
  
Cordelia raised and eyebrow. "Buffy I just exist"  
  
Willow quickly turned a giggle into a cough when Cordelia unleashed her patent glare.  
  
Suddenly Buffy frowned. "Where is Xander?"  
  
The other two girls frowned, and then Buffy gasped as a large thumping sound echoed through the empty school and then the sound of breaking glass.  
  
"Oh God"  
  
The three girls sprinted for the door, Buffy mapped out the school in her mind, she skidded to a halt as she saw the cause of the broken glass. Someone had broken the window of one of the classrooms, her enhanced vision narrowed in on the pool of blood on the floor and the glass stained with red. Her heart leaped into her throat.  
  
Xander was nowhere to be seen. 


	5. Before the action comes the thinking

"Angel stop pacing," Buffy commanded without looking up from her book. Tension filled the library, making the silence seem choking, but nobody wanted to say anything.

Angel had spent an hour looking at the scene, filing everything in his mind, trying to pinpoint the boy, the attackers...anything.

"I'll stop pacing when we find Xander" Angel bit out, his gaze not coming up from the piece of glass with Xander's blood on it.

"Brooding isn't going to help get Xander back" Willow offered tentatively.

Angel mimicked a sigh. He didn't want to be getting at his friends but his desire to find Xander, to make sure he was all right, to look upon his face was quickly overwhelming him.

"Well there's good news and bad," Buffy said finally. "Either Xand was just a snack or it's trap. Some vamp nest that needs to be wiped out and they are using him as bate"

"Pretty much bad news" Willow said softly.

"Giles thinks they're holed up in a mausoleum in the cemetery"

Angel was already moving. "I'll find you when you're ready to go"

Without another glance the vampires swept out of the library.

Angel didn't want to think, to brood he had spent many years doing that and he was sick of it. Yet despite his best attempts he found himself victim of his dark thoughts. He wanted to be sure that Xander would be fine, he had no doubt that Buffy and the scoobies would do their best to save him but he also knew that vampires were ruthless and impatient.

He didn't know whether Xander would live through the night.

Things were up in the air between him and Xander they hadn't spoken in almost a week, not that unusual but since the dance Angel felt that they had a lot to talk about.

He understood Xander's hesitancy and shared it but he knew now, where that deep set hatred had come from.

Love.

He was in love with a seventeen year old, mouthy teenager.

Angel was not in the habit of admitting his feelings, after witnessing over a 100 years of humans abusing each other's feelings he felt the need to keep his own locked away tightly. Of course that would never do for Xander, indeed half the reason he had kissed Xander was because the boy would not get off his case.

His ponderings had taken him outside the cemetery and he realized he had been walking for an hour and a half, he could see Cordy, Buffy, Willow and Giles hiking across the ground; it was time.

He was getting Xander back.

Note: I wont be showing how they get Xander back because I am bad at fight scenes. Next update should be on Saturday


	6. safe in your arms

"Are you sure you are alright Xander?" Giles asked again, and was rewarded with a glare. Giles just huffed, he felt no reason not to ask, he thought of Xander, Buffy, Willow and Cordelia as his extended family and his job as watcher left him not time for a social life or a love life he felt it was unlikely that he would have children of his own.

"I'm fine" Xander groused as Buffy applied a cooling balm on his forehead, he didn't want people fussing over him, Buffy finally relinquished the balm and looked over her work. Xande's face was covered in bruises the biggest on covered half of his left cheek.

"I have some cover all if you want to get rid of that bruise" Cordelia offered as she sat on the large table Xander rolled his eyes at her.

"I guess you are really alright" Buffy said finally.

"You'd better thank Angel...." She broke off as she saw the library door swish closed silently, before she could react Xander had jumped off the table and handed Buffy the medical equipment and

followed the vampire.

He hit the halls but couldn't see Angel, basing it on guess work he turned left and finally caught up with the vampire.

"Hey wait up" he called.

Angel stopped and Xander skidded to a halt, they faced each other in the hallway for long minutes. Xander felt slightly foolish, he hadn't thought about what he would say when he had caught up with Angel he had simply ran on instinct.

"Uh...Thanks....for coming to get me...I really appreciate it"

"It wasn't a problem" Angel replied softly.

"No Uh it really was cause if you had left me there, then no one would have blamed you"

"Your friends love you" Angel argued and Xander shrugged. He wasn't concerned with his friend's right then, the library seemed millions of years away from what was going on in this hallway. And something was happening yet Xander couldn't define it.

"I just wanted to say thanks" Xander said after a moment.

"All the people I had ever thought would have come get me your name wasn't in the top 100"

"Of all the people I had ever thought would have kissed me your name wasn't in the top 100"

Xander grinned at the vampire's humour....who knew Angel had a sense of humour, Xander hadn't.

"So we both acknowledge what happened to us was definitely in the weird and not normal column?" Xander asked, Angel pondered that for a moment then nodded.

"Not normal" he conceded.

"But not disturbing or wrong or whatever...just different" He didn't realize he was taking steps forward until he was face to face with the vampire.

"Different is good" Angel agreed.

"So all this dumb girl talk about feelings isn't necessary?" Xander breathed.

Angel felt the boy's breath on his skin and was reminded again why he loved him. He took the final step closer, bowing his head slightly.

"Definitely unnecessary"

No one knew who reached first, but it didn't matter in that tiny vacuum of space that they filled. Nothing mattered except them and that they kissed with all the passion they possessed. Angel was aware in all his 250 years he was completely unknowing in this situation. He knew that rationally they needed to talk but he was more then willing to allow hormones to take them on this journey for Angel to taste just a little bit of life.


End file.
